Usually the captain writes the gear reviews because, well, he cares about all that technical stuff, and I don’t. But this is one product he can’t test, so it’s my turn.
A friend of mine gave me this device last year on my 40th birthday in anticipation of our trip (or perhaps some unknown, future, forty-something urinary malfunction?). It’s called the GoGirl, a so-called “Female Urination Device” (FUD). [Not to be confused with a “Male Urination Device” (MUD or PENIS).] It’s made of medical grade silicone. Mine is lavender and kinda girly looking, but they also come in camo. The GoGirl is sort of a flexible funnel that allows women to pee standing up, like a man. A man with a lavender penis.
When we’re underway and the boat is heeling, sitting down on the head can be a challenge, so I thought the GoGirl might be useful. I decided to give it a try on a rough passage between Hawksbill Cay and New Providence Island in the Bahamas. Sailing can be boring, so I figured it would pass the time if nothing else.
GoGirl’s instructions say to “practice at home” first, but home was 1000 miles away so I didn’t have that luxury. I held the FUD as indicated trying to “make a tight seal in the back” as directed, but it quickly became evident that the seal wasn’t tight enough because I ended up peeing on my underwear and down one leg. Nice. After readjusting the GoGirl, I managed to make my mark for the most part. Sort of. I’m not sure which is more trouble: trying to sit on the head while underway or cleaning up after trying unsuccessfully to use the GoGirl.
They weren’t kidding when they said practice at home. It would have been a lot easier to use the GoGirl while standing in my stationary bathroom at home instead of in the tiny, pitching, rolling head of a heeling sailboat. It’s difficult to “make a tight seal” with the GoGirl when the boat is bouncing up and down and you’re trying not to fall over. I think the GoGirl has potential if I practice more, so perhaps tonight while we’re anchored and the boat is still I’ll try again. If it doesn’t work, we can repurpose it somehow I’m sure. Cake frosting tube tip? Silicone egg poacher? Gas mask?